Penguin Land and the Escape From Walmart!

Staci and I are in Hua Hin, Thailand. But for some reason, in this dream Hua Hin is an Island as opposed to a coastal town. I’m at a church setting up my guitar and preparing to lead worship for the Sunday morning service. Staci comes up and tells me she needs something from Lotus (like a Walmart) and she wants me to come along. I’m not sure if I have time before the service starts but she convinces me to go. Before I know it we are on a plane flying out! “Where are we going!?” I ask? “Bangkok?!?” “No” she replies calmly “it’s just a shuttle flight to the other side of the island. We’ll make it back in time.” So we exit the plane and enter the Lotus. Staci goes straight to a cordoned off area near the back of the store that has a large sign that says “Penguin Land.” But it’s empty. “Where are all the penguins?!” She asks. The attendant informs her that they are not there today. Staci is pretty disappointed. So I tell her I’ll be right back and I start looking around the store. After a while I realize that I am back outside after going through the wrong door. Oh no! They won’t let me back in! So I walk around the back of the store and I find a fire exit which I promptly use as an entrance. The alarms starts going off and store attendants start chasing me! So I run into a restroom that has two entrances. I run inside, throw away my coat, hat and Big Gulp and then exit the other way. It works and I lose the attendants. So I head back into the isles to look for Staci. But before I find her I come across the place where they are keeping the penguins! “I’ll take one please!” I ask while hastily looking over my shoulders. “I’m sorry sir but we are evacuating the store because of the alarm.” She explains. So I plead with her and she finally sells me the penguin. So I take the live penguin and I exit the store. Just outside I find Staci and hand her the penguin. She’s pretty excited about it but I suggest we get back to the plane. So we exit the area along with the masses of evacuees. I wonder if I’ll make it back in time!

I overinflated my dog!

My mom asked me to inflate our dog buttercup. When she asks this it makes perfect sense to me. She is asking me to check the air like I would my motorbike. So I take Buttercup to an electric air pump at the gas station.
She's got a pin hole in the middle of her chest and one on her stomach.
So
I put 32 Kgs of pressure in each hole. (this is the same pressure my motorbike requires) So I finish airing her up and then turn the pump off.
At that point she just sort of keels over. Then my mom walks up and asks if I overinflated the dog. "I don't think so.. I put in 32 Kgs of air." I explain. "32 Kgs!! It's supposed to be 32 Lbs!! Darin! We don't use the metric system in America! That was way to much air!" She explains. So I take the pump needle and begin to let some air out. Slowly Buttercup begins to be able to stand again and she immediately licks my face.

I'm Will Smith... I'm invisible...and I can fly!

As the dream opens I realize that I am Will Smith, but viewing the dream in the first person. I am in a trailer home with a big yard out front. There are about 6 or 7 kids watching a TV in the room. Meanwhile in the kitchen, which is part of the room, a grungy looking dude in a muscle shirt prepares various drugs and begins to package them for distribution. As I look over at the kids I notice they are all under the age of 6 and intently watching some children’s show. I soon realize that I am invisible. No one can see me. So I begin to take note as to what kind of drugs he is making and where he is hiding them in the house. With this information I can have him put away and I can save these kids from danger! So I continue observing when all of the sudden a kid is tugging at my sleeve and asking me to watch the show with them. What?!? They can see me? The drug dealer does not notice what is going on since the kids are all being loud and he is focused. So I quietly tell the kid that I will join them in a min. Soon another kid comes over to talk to me. This time the drug dealer notices. But I get away and he goes back to work. A few mins later he looks my way with suspicion! I look down and realize that I am casting a shadow! So I move away from the window. He goes back to work. For the next few mins I continue to observe all the while avoiding the dealer when he moves around the room and avoiding the large window so I don’t cast a shadow. After a few mins 2 kids begin talking to me again! Oh no! Finally the dealer realizes what is going on and he yells “I knew it! It’s YOU!” He grabs a shotgun and I head for the door! The kids all run with me. All 7 of them are grabbing me and running with me saying they want to show me their castle fort! I can’t break away and they are giving away my position. As with many of dreams, I have the ability to fly. But just like always I can’t fly high and I can’t fly fast. So I manage to break free and I get up into the air. Now I am flying about 3-5 feet above the kids and the dealer is in pursuit! As I fly across the yard the kids are still right underneath me! I finally make it to the other side of the property which sits on a cliff over looking the ocean. So I fly out over the ocean hoping that I can get far enough away to lose him. My shadow is on the water though so the dealer starts swimming after me. Soon I see an island in the distance about 30 yards in width. So I land on the island. There is an 8 year old boy waiting there. As I land he says “Dad! Did you get my ball?!?” “Yes I did”, I say. And then I produce a ball that has been ripped in half. “I’ll get you a new one ok? Now run a long and play” I tell him. So the boy disappears into a hole beneath a rock. The drug dealer finally makes it to land. “So! What were you doing in my house?!” He yells. “Well I was coming to ask you why you ripped my son’s ball apart when it washed ashore! But then I saw that you were dealing drugs and I decided I had to stop you!” I explain. At this point my son walks back up and so he glares at him and says “Well, the ball washed up on MY property but now I have to kill you for seeing what you saw!” At that moment I hit him on the head with a rock which knocks him down. I grab my son and take him back down the hole. To my surprise the hole drops me into a room in an ordinary house! I go to the front door with my son and look out at a typical suburban neighborhood! It’s some kind of portal! So I tell him to go to his friend’s house to play. After he runs off I grab a rake from a basket nearby. Just then the drug dealer emerges with a shovel. We touch our weapons together and then begin maneuvering around as we begin our battle! All the while we are staring into each others eyes. No one is backing down from this fight! …..Just then my phone rings which wakes me up. Oh! It’s Staci!

Ashley, The President, and the Lack of Cell Phones

The scene opens as a middle school aged girl named Ashley heads to school. Her father, a politician, is already at the office so the maid and staff see her off.

Now the scene changes and years have passed. We see this girl, now high school aged coming home from a day at her high school. Once again her father is absent. As she arrived at her apartment her brother meets her in the hall. “I didn’t want to alarm you so I decided to meet you in the hall to tell you. There are a lot of people waiting in the apartment to speak to you. Something has happened.” As Ashley and her brother enter the apartment we see dozens of people crowding the small one bedroom space. This is no surprise party or intervention. We now learn that her father has become President of the United States and there has been a terrorist attack in the city! These people have all come here to tell her that her sister has not been heard of since she left her middle school an hour ago. With access to the city shut down they have come to Ashley for help. Shocked, Ashley asks her brother why he has not yet done anything. “Well, ever since I tried to stage that coup 17 months ago I have no influence or power! I only have this desk job because you gave it to me! It’s up to you now to save our sister!” So Ashley takes off on her mission to find her sister.

Meanwhile, the scene changes and we see her sister getting out of school and going straight to the Whitehouse safe room. But since her dad, the President, has long refused to buy the family cell phones Ashley has no way of knowing this. So Ashley travels needlessly into harms way.

The scene changes again and we see the President notified that Ashley is in the city searching for the very sister that is now safely by his side. The President collapses to the floor in grief. If only he had purchased that family cell phone plan!!

The Homeless Guy

My mom has volunteered to man the prayer chapel and its Christmas Eve. The chapel is supposed to be available all night and they just needed someone to be there. So she volunteers and I offer to keep her company. So we visit for awhile but when it becomes apparent that no one is going to show up she decides to get some sleep. So she heads to a cot in the corner and I take the couch with our dog Buttercup. Throughout the night I have noticed a homeless guy watching through the windows so I ask my mom if it’s safe to go to sleep with him out there. “Oh yeah. It’s fine. He can’t get in.” She says. So we both nod off before too long. Well soon after falling asleep I am awaken to a sound and I jump up thinking that the homeless guy got in! Soon I realize that he didn’t and my yell woke my mom. “He can’t get in Darin, go back to sleep” she says. So I do but then I dream about a boy named John who is in the hospital and I am a volunteer helping the nurses out. He’s got some kind of eye injury and so I help take care of him. But all of the sudden I am awaken by a sound again! So I again jump up and yell thinking the homeless guy is inside. But instead I notice a young couple praying in the front pew. “Oh, I’m sorry” I explain. “No problem at all” they answer. He goes on to explain that he is a doctor and just got off the 3am shift and wanted to share a Christmas Eve service with his wife since he had to work earlier. They go on to explain that their son John is in the hospital with an eye injury. “Oh don’t worry” I say. “I was there earlier and he’s doing fine.” “What?” They answer. “How could you have been? He’s in Iraq.” Just then I realize that they got in somehow and so the homeless guy must have as well! I look over at my mom and behind her in the shadows is the homeless man approaching her!!!

Obama Interrupts To Ask For Money

I am supposed to be meeting someone in the main office at my church to record a voice over for a video I am working on. But as I am setting up I start having a lot of trouble with the software I am using to record. Mrs. Mott is waiting patiently to record her narration. As I continue messing with it Barack Obama walks in! He tells me that my church has agreed to give him a $40,000 donation! This puzzles me and I wonder if that is even legal given our tax exempt status. But hey, he seems like a nice guy so I begin the transfer.

He goes on to explain that this was a mutual fund he went in on with my church and they are splitting the profits. So I begin the transfer but after about $20,000 is transferred the transfer fails. I am about to start it over when I realize that I should probably check with our accountant as I am overstepping my bounds here as a mere former employee in the tech dept. So I apologize to both Obama and Mrs. Mott and I step into the hall to use my cell to call our accountant Kevin. It takes awhile to reach him and I try his home, work and cell. Finally I reach him and I hear country music playing in the background. So I tell him what happened and I ask him if I can go ahead with the transfer. “No.” Is his response. “Oh.. ok.. um.. yeah just thought I would check… I will tell Obama.” I reply.

So I head back to the office to break the news. About then I see Brian Wells and his brother making the rounds talking to people. “Brian’s in town?!” But I don’t have time to stop as much as I want to! So I keep heading back to the office and I find that Obama has his Blackberry, laptop and various papers strewn about as he makes various calls seeking financial contributions. Meanwhile Mrs. Mott is asleep in the corner. So I tell Obama the news, we can’t do the transfer. He quickly begins gathering his things and says “Well Mr. Dunn that is very disappointing.” He gets up and leaves. “Was that a scam? “ I wonder. So I go over to wake up Mrs. Mott to begin the recording.

Buttercup and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skulls

My older brother Trey and I are hanging out at my parents house because I’ve just gotten home from Thailand. He’s got our awesome family dog Buttercup in his lap. I really want to hold Buttercup but I feel bad asking him so I don’t. He’s on one couch and I’m on the other and we are watching TV. He’s flipping around the channels and he passes “Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull!”

“Trey! Go back! That was the new Indiana Jones movie which isn’t even out yet! How did you get that channel?!?” I yell excitedly.
“I’m not sure, I was just flipping around.” He replies.

So he keeps flipping but he can’t find it! So he tosses me the remote to see if I can find it. So I start flipping but all I’m getting are Thai TV shows! GRRR! So I give up and we just watch a Thai soap opera.

After a few mins he sighs and says “Well this stinks. You want the dog?”

“Yes!” I proclaim! And he hands me Buttercup.